


I've Met Everything Except Aliens

by Audrea_Lannistark



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Comics), Guardians of the Galaxy - All Media Types, Marvel, Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Supernatural
Genre: Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-21
Updated: 2015-05-21
Packaged: 2018-03-31 15:36:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,043
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3983479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Audrea_Lannistark/pseuds/Audrea_Lannistark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean Winchester and Peter Quill share their love of girls, their rides, and classic tunes. Edited RP with two internet friends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I've Met Everything Except Aliens

**Author's Note:**

> Written with the brilliant Pinners L Adrian as Dean Winchester and Sky Low as Peter Quill. 
> 
> L Adrian (Dean): https://www.pinterest.com/l4s0104/
> 
> Sky Low (Peter): https://www.pinterest.com/skylerlow12/
> 
> Me (Gamora): https://www.pinterest.com/crowleyincanada/

Gamora's POV

"Peter, are you trying to kill me!? I thought we were over that!" The Milano swerves and does a flip.

 

"No. Well, maybe..." He grins and does another flip "No." 

 

A set of mountains are visible through the fog and we crash into one of them, skidding along.

 

"Just land her already! Any longer and we'll crash!"

  

"I'm trying, okay?!" He slowly lands her but hits something beneath us.

 

The Milano skids to a halt. Could've been worse, I guess. "What was that? We landed on something."

 

"I don't know... Let's go check it out."

 

I see a black car wedged under one of the Milano's wings. Then I see the man inside. "Are you okay?! Peter, he's hurt!"

 

Dean's POV

 

My head hurts. I can hear muffled voices. It sounds like they're talking to me. I open my eyes slowly and see a green woman pulling at the door.

 

"How did I not see a black car?!" A man's voice says.

 

I feel hands grabbing me. I cough, feeling blood trickle down my chin. "Thank-" I gasp before completely blacking out.

 

Gamora's POV

 

"We need to get him on the Milano and fast." Peter picks him up.

 

I help Peter pull the man out of the wreckage. He's really quite handsome, actually, and Peter catches me staring.

 

"Let's get him in the Milano." I repeat quickly, avoiding eye contact.

 

 

Dean's POV

 

 

I groggily wake up to bleeping noises. Opening my eyes, I gasp. I'm in some sort of spaceship! "Where..."

 

"Hi."

 

I turn and see a young man with a beard looking at me. "Uh, this place yours?"

 

"Yup."

 

"It's pretty nice. But a little dirty." I sit up and run my hand through my hair. "Who was that green woman?"

 

"That's Gamora."

 

"Okay. Why am I here?"

 

"The Milano."

 

"Because...?"

 

"Well, we accidentally crashed your car.... and you were unconscious."

 

I rub my head. "So that's what that noise was," I mutter.

 

"What noise? There's no noise. I don't here a noise."

 

"I meant the noise I heard just before you landed on the roof of my car."

 

"Uh... there was a noise?"

 

I nod. "Yeah. Then a crash. Then I blacked out."

 

"What did the noise sound like?"

 

"Like a really loud engine."

 

"That was the Milano."

 

"Guessed that."

 

"Okay, then why did you ask?"

 

"Confirmation."

 

"I can understand that."

 

I lay back down. "How bad has my car been damaged?"

 

"I don't know."

 

"Hey. Are you okay?"

 

The green woman, Gamora, rushes back into the room with bandages and a first aid kit.

 

She's freaking gorgeous. I close my eyes to think.

 

"Uh? Hello? Peter?"

 

I smile a little. Those are two sentences that summarize my relationship with Samny.

 

"Sorry. What's your name? I'm Gamora. And, uh...yes, I'm an alien."

 

I smile again, then open my eyes. "Wha-oh right. Sorry, bit lost in thought. My name's Dean."

 

"I'm Star Lord," the man adds.

 

I raise an eyebrow at Gamora. "Star Lord?"

 

"Yes, Star Lord." Star Lord repeats. Gamora gives him a look.

 

I shrug. "Okay. So, how bad has my car been damaged?"

 

"Dunno."

 

"Come on. We'll go out and check." I put on my boots.

 

I nod and get off. Then grab the table as a nauseous feeling comes over me. "I-I'll need help."

 

Gamora rushes over and puts her arm around my shoulder. "Are you alright? You can stay in here if you'd like."

 

"I'll stay with him."

 

Dean shakes his head. "No, no, I need to see how my car is. Please."

 

We climb out of the Milano and into the wreckage. Amidst the crumbled asphalt road is a mangled heap of black and silver metal.

 

I stare blankly, slowly registering that the wreckage in from of me actually was my car. I stumble to it and touch it. "Sorry you're so banged up, Baby." Tears start to form. "I'm sorry."

 

Gamora cross my arms and gives me another one of those death stares. Sheesh. This woman is scary. "'Baby?!' That's almost as bad as Peter and 'Millie'!"

  

 

 

I turn around. "Look, this car was my dad's, and it's one of the only things that wasn't destroyed when my mom died, okay?" 

 

"I'm sorry...I...didn't really have a good childhood either." I step back and put my arm around Peter. "Actually, we're all kind of broken here."

 

 

Gamora's POV

 

 

"So..." I clear my throat and step towards the car. "We'll see what we can savage." I reach in and pull out normal human things—burger wrappers, mixtapes (a little dated, but understandable), and...FBI badges? "Peter, could you come here?"

 

Dean grabs the badges. "I'm not FBI, those are fake." He walk over to the trunk and open it. "Okay, good. The weapons aren't damaged."

 

"Fake badges? Weapons? I take it you're not some average Joe. Would you like to tell me what's going on?"

 

He smiles a little as he takes all the weapons out of the secret compartment. "My brother and I hunt supernatural beings that are causing trouble and endangering lives."

 

"Don't expect us to be surprised. We're rogue crime fighters from Nova. Come on back to the Milano."

 

"Hold on." He grabs his tapes, badges, and the weapons and follows us back.

 

I lead Dean inside the Milano and hand him a flask. "Here. It's Peter's, but I'm sure he won't mind."

 

"I sure as hell mind!"

 

"Shut up. He needs it." I put the flask down anyway and pull my own bottle from my belt. "It's urerre. Novanian liquor. Try it."

 

Dean looks at it and shrugs. "Cheers," he says and take a deep drink. "Oh man, that stuff is good."

 

"I know. I buy it in bulk. There are about 20 cases of it in the back. So, do you want to tell me about yourself? I'm not exactly the therapy group type, but I'm curious..."

 

"Weeeellll... I hunt monsters, I like to drink, my little brother is with our angel friend right now, I literally have been to Hell and back, what else do you want to know?"

 

"Met any aliens?" I snap back, not making any other reaction to Dean's adventures except for a smirk.

 

"I have now."

 

I take the bottle from him. "Do you want to bunk with us tonight? We do have a spare room, and your car's—Baby is sort of wrecked..."

 

He nods. "Yeah, and do you have a phone or something? I should call Sam."

 

"Um, try this." I take an all-glass tablet out of my pocket and give it to Dean.

 

He stares at it in confusion. "Uh, where are the numbers? Sorry, I can't read this."

 

"Oh, right. English." I pull the tablet out of his hands and twiddle with it a bit. "Here." A ten digit keypad glows in the screen.

 

Dean's POV

 

 

I dial Sam and wait. Dammit, voicemail. "Hey, Sam this is Dean. So I'm, uh, going to be out for a while. I'm fine, but it might take longer to get to you."

 

When I'm done, Gamora stands up and starts walking through the Milano. "Come on, I'll show you to your room." There's a bed, a tablet displaying the time, and an assortment of clothes and shoes scattered across the floor. 

 

"Sorry about this," she tells me. "This is my overflow closet."

 

I laugh. "I've slept in a lot worse, so don't mind me. Do you guys have a shower on board? I feel gross."

 

"Yeah. Straight down the hallway on your left. Door locks automatically."

 

"Thanks." I walk down and step in. The controls are a bit weird, but they're easy to figure out.

 

"Almost done?" She knocks on the bathroom door. "Peter's outside trying to fix the transmission, so take all the time you need."

 

"Okay!" Since it's been awhile since I've had a decent shower, I spend a few more minutes under the running water.

 

Gamora's POV

 

 

I set towels outside the door and go into the extra room—where Dean's staying—to get changed. My outfit is all ripped, so I pick out a leather mini dress and matching boots.

                

 

Dean's POV

 

 

I get out and see the towels. They're really fluffy, which is my favorite kind of towel, surprisingly. Once I'm dry, I go to the extra room (towel around waist) and walk in on Gamora changing. "Oh sorry!" I close the door and facepalm.

 

 

Gamora's POV

 

 

I shriek as Dean opens the door. "What the hell?!" He slams it shut. "Sorry, I should've told you I was in here. This has happened a few times with some of Peter's friends." I speak to him through the door.

 

 

"Well, it's still really awkward. You can take your time. I have a fluffy towel."

 

I laugh. When I'm done changing, I cautiously open the door. "Can I look? Have you changed yet?"

 

He turns around and blushes awkwardly."Uh, no. I was going to see if the room has any clean clothes..."

 

"Oh. Right. I'll just..." We awkwardly shuffle through the doorway. "So, I'll...go. Yeah. Bye." I clear my throat and step away.

 

Dean's POV

 

I nod and walk in the room and close the door. I let the towel fall as I slide down onto the floor, blushing furiously. This is just great. Well, better find some clothes.

 

Gamora's POV

 

I put up my hair and walk outside the Milano, cooling off literally and emotionally. Peter is nowhere in sight, so I go back to the scene of the crime and take a peek at the car.

 

Dean's POV

 

I find clothes that fit and walk out back to the Impala. Gamora's there. "Anything else damaged?"

 

"No, I was just looking... '67 Impala, eh? Nice."

 

I nod. "Yeah. Man, I love this car. Good engine, good milage, good storage space in the trunk..."

 

"She's nice. Really. For an Earth vehicle. I spend a lot of time around Peter. I've picked it up. He still has his 80s childhood posters of Lamborghinis in the Milano."

 

I nod in approval. "Not bad. I prefer Chevy, but each to their own."

 

"Yeah. How do you feel? I don't suppose you know where the nearest town is."

 

"No. I don't."

 

"Do you have a map, then?"

 

I nod and point to the charred pieces of paper in the front seat.

 

Gamora's POV

 

"That'll be no use." I calibrate my tablet. "This way. There's a small town ahead about 10 kilometres."

 

Dean nods. "Yeah, I know, but what about my weapons?"

 

"I don't know. Everyone's immobilized right now. Do you want just take a couple and get going?"

 

"Yeah. Hold on." He runs to the trunk of the Impala and gets as many as he can conceal, then grabs a small but powerful handgun.

 

"North. Let's go." I secure two daggers under my leather jacket. "If we keep going without stops, we should be there in an hour."

 

Dean nods. "Alright. I'm supposed to meet my brother and friend there. Want to come see them?"

 

"Sure. So, you said 'Angel'. How long have you been in this relationship?"

 

He makes a strangled cat noise. Blushing furiously, he stares at me. "I'm-we're not- look, he is an actual angel."

 

"Riiiiiight. I definitely believe you. If he's an actual angel, why didn't he stop you from getting into the crash?"

 

"Because I told him to not worry about me I told him that he needed to protect my brother at all costs, even if that meant my life on the line."

 

"What's with your brother, then?" The Milano's just out of sight.

 

"Like I said, we hunt monsters. It's not exactly a safe business."

 

"Well, it'll be nice to meet another utopian nuclear Brady bunch."

 

He laughs. "Dude, that show was awesome."

 

"When I was about 10, just a baby assassin, I used to wander around the streets waiting for my target. But then I'd see the Brady Bunch playing in this bar and I'd watch the entire episode and get side tracked. The nice lady who ran it knew I came every week and she gave me juice and we'd watch it together. She just liked old Terran television.

 

"I watched reruns when I turned 18. It was—wait, you were an assassin at ten?"

 

"I was an assassin at 10 months."

 

"Wha—why?"

 

"I was born with it. In my veins. My dad did it, my sister did it. it was the family...business, I guess you'd say. I was raised in a childhood that revolved around my job. Sometimes I wish I was normal."

 

"Tell me about it. You know why I hunt monsters?"

 

"Enlighten me."

 

"When I was five, a demon killed my mother. So my dad decided to get revenge. And here I am, following in his footsteps."

 

"Born into a life of loss, raised with the muddy dangerous job in the world," I mumble.

 

"At least your father wasn't emotionally and physically abusive."

 

This seems me into a fit of laughter. I laugh until I cry. "My God. You can't be serious? Your dad is the Dad of the Year compared to my dad."

 

"Really? Really? My dad would leave unexpectedly for weeks, giving us a bit of food and money. But there would always be a lot more days without anything. I took most of the beatings from him being drunk because I couldn't bear the thought of my little brother getting hurt. I became a soldier when I was five. I never had a childhood. I had to keep switching schools. You want to see the products of his parenting?" He rolls up a sleeve and shows me a scar that runs up to his shoulder.

 

I cry a single tear and wordlessly unzip my jacket to reveal scars, bruises, cuts, burns and abrasions covering my back. "Kill the next name on the list. Never let them see the flaws. I have always buried then deep underneath the ground."

 

Dean's POV

 

I nod in understanding and show you my back. "Don't mess up. Never waste a bullet. If you do, you'll get the business end of discipline."

 

"Many of my targets were children. There was one girl, eleven, same as me. I can hear her saying, to this day: 'Please, no. I know you. We'll be friends. You won't have to be alone. Just give me one day to show you what's it's like to have a friend.' I was famous by that point, on everyone's tablets and the news. It struck me as odd, that after all the bad I did, she didn't want to turn me in. The reward was high and she was poor. She wanted to change me for the better, not chain me for the worse. And I just thrust the knife in her head like another piece of flesh with no meaning, gone forever."

 

"I've had to make the decision to watch my brother fight during the literal apocalypse against our other brother while possessed by Satan. And I couldn't do anything. It's really horrible, watching someone you love and care about being controlled by the Devil while not being able to do anything. It reminded me of how it all started, why this was even happening to us. And I remember feeling the exact same way as I did when my mom died: angry, scared, helpless. I never saw her die, but my dad did. It must have been horrible for him to watch."

 

Gamora's POV

 

"I set fire to a house once," I sob, waves of emotion washing over me. "I could've killed your mother! I was to kill you and you were told to kill me..." I collapse and smell the cool country air, the smell of ash and blood lingering on my clothes from so long ago. A thousand years later, and it never really seems to go away.

 

Dean kneels next to me and lifts my face to look at him. "No, you didn't. My mom was killed , and the house was burned, by a demon."

 

"It could've been me. Me, me, me! Get out, the flames are here now, flames lit by a match of mine, get out!"

 

He grabs your shoulders. "Gamora, listen to me. It wasn't you. You're already out. Breathe, okay? Just breathe."

 

I take a deep breath of fresh, clean air. "I'm sorry. I should be heading back to Peter, I don't know why I'm chaperoning you to a town that's practically in sight."

 

"Neither do I. You're good company, though."

 

I pick myself up and orient myself. "There. Just near the water reservoir." I see something in the distance. 

 

"Hey, it's Sam and Cas."

 

'Sam' and 'Cas' are moving towards us, waving. One of them is very, very tall and has long hair and a plaid shirt. The other is significantly shorter, wearing a suit and trenchcoat. "Where's the angel?"

 

"Trench coat." He runs to Sam and Cas to give them hugs. Then, he drags them over to you. "Guys, I have a lot to tell you." "So do we. You know that haunting in Iowa?" "Why is that woman green?" "Cas!"

 

"Uh, hello? I'm still here. I'm Gamora, by the way. And yes, I was born green."

 

Dean's POV

 

"I'm Sam," my brother says and shakes your hand. "Dean's brother. This is our friend, Castiel. He's an angel, so he's not very used to human stuff."

 

"Hi Cas. Can I call you that?"

 

"Yes. Do you have another name you prefer to be called by?" "He means nicknames," I explain.

 

"No. Just Gamora." She points to the Milano out in the distance. "Peter's there. You can call him Peter or Star Lord."

 

"Star Lord?" Sam scoffs. "I do not understand."

 

"Both of you, leave it." Dean snaps.

 

"I'm not explaining." Gamora throws her hands up defensively.

 

Sam laughs. "Well, can we meet this Star Lord?"

 

"Yeah, but I don't think he's done yet. Do you want to head to the next town? Back to the Milano?"

 

"Dean, where's the Impala?" Cas asks. I make a face. "At the Milano." "Why?" "I think you should come see."

 

We slowly make our way back to the Milano. Peter's nowhere to be seen.

 

I look around. "Where is he?"


End file.
